The Intern

Hi readers! How time flies! It was March when I last wrote anything here, and it's already September now!

I actually have something in my draft about updates on what I've been up to the past half year, but for some reason I haven't published it yet (I didn't open and read it because it'll just make me forget what I wanted to write now). So I hope I'll get around finishing it so at least you readers know what I've been doing while I'm MIA. (Hint to new readers: I never actually got around finishing what I promised to do here, so don't hold your breath) This post is just going to be what I've been up to only for the past month, so that leaves about 5 months for the other post to fill up, if it ever comes out.

This past month, I've been busy with work (what's new). I've also been busy doing something I haven't done in a while.... dating (suprise!). It all started before the long weekend at the start of August in Singapore. There was a new intern in the neighboring team, and I noticed that she always leave office very late (she left even later than me!). I wasn't very sure if she's pretty since she's sitting with her back facing me, and I've been thinking of approaching her for a while but I was super busy with one thing or another for a couple of weeks so I hadn't had the chance until this one random evening.

I just finished conducting mock interview for a friend who's intending to leave his current company, and was just going up to pick up my bag and leave with that friend (he waited outside since visitors are not allowed in working space). I noticed that the intern was still there and  there's no one around (I'm very self-conscious when it comes to this kind of thing) so I decided this is as best a chance I'm ever going to get, so I approached her. Although she's very shy, she seems quite friendly and opens up quite easily. Looks wise I'd say she's quite decent (above my standard by quite a bit). I asked her the standard question of "what's your plan this coming long weekend" and turned out she planned to go back to office because she had no friends to go out with. Out of compassion (feel free to puke) I asked her if she'd like me to bring her around to at least the most basic things you should do in Singapore (like Merlion, at least?) She's up for it and that's how I got my first date with her.

On the day itself, I almost regretted my decision for promising going out with her. I was hooked to Dragon Age 2 at the time and I don't really look forward to meet the National Day crowd (the day we settled on turned out to coincide with National Day Parade), but I thought what the hell, I've never even gone to the area on National Day, so probably it won't be too bad....

Obviously, I was wrong. But I'd say it's all worth it the moment I saw her at the MRT. She looked so stunning, and her shyness despite how pretty she looked really made me like I'm the luckiest guy in the world at the moment (throwback to One Direction's very first song). We had a great time and even managed to catch the NDP fireworks display, which both of us really enjoyed.

After that, I somehow managed to secure another date with her quite easily (I just talked to her after work hours and asked her if there's any other place in Singapore she'd like to visit). The following weekend, we went out from lunchtime until rather late (we went to Gardens by the Bay and caught the Supertree Grove light show). I was dead exhausted by the end of it (and she noticed and felt bad - I guess it was really obvious) but we enjoyed ourselves.

The following weekend, she said she didn't want to go out because she needs to catch up with work, so I let her do her work. I'm a bit sad that I couldn't spend time with her, but as it turned out, she accidentally locked herself out of the office and her house (she went out for dinner without her office badge and she left her house keys in the office) so I met her at the office on Saturday night to help her get her stuff from the office. Of course there are easier ways (like get her to pick up my badge from my house and return to me on Monday) but this is an excuse for me to see her so ¯\_(ツ)_/¯.

The following weekdays, I could tell that she started to be less cold towards me (previously she always looked down and avoid eye-contact with me for some reason - I'm guessing because she's shy though there's a chance that I'm actually scary to her but I chose to believe the former, especially because she does that to everyone, AFAICT. She started to smile and wave back at me, which feels great. I got bolder and started asking her to have lunch together when my whole team abandoned me (not often but sometimes happens). There's one day where I stay around in the office quite late because I was playing board games with my friends, and -I think- she actually waited for me just so that we could walk home together (not very long because she takes MRT and I take bus, but still). Of course there's a chance that it's just a coincidence, but I'm fairly certain that it wasn't because (1) she asked me what time I was going to finish before I started and (2) she started to pack her things when she noticed I started to pack my things - I actually intended to go to her desk when I was done but I think she's scared that I might leave her behind lol). She also asked if I'd like to have dinner together last Friday, which unfortunately I couldn't because my team already planned to have a mini-farewell dinner for an intern in my team whose last day was that day. Bummer! But anyway, I was really above the clouds when she asked me out. I don't think any girls have ever asked me out before! (Pathetic alert)

This weekend, her mom is coming to town so she's not free, and anyway I'm not free because I have to finish writing my performance self-assessment anyway (the half-yearly employee performance review) so I took the time to -try- to finish it (which I obviously didn't manage to do) and chatted with her intermittently (probably that's why - I'm too distracted).

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This wasn't what I planned to write, but I guess it's great that I manage to document these events before I forget. And anyway what I initially wanted to write is that a reflection why was I so attracted to this person and how I can apply the things I've done for more serious attempts. I cannot say that I'm seriously dating her since there's really no way we can be together in the long run - not in the foreseeable future, at least - since she's going to continue her studies in the US and how she didn't really plan to return to Singapore in a while...

OK, so why I was so attracted to her. I must say I am probably a sucker for shy and childlike girls. Those two qualities of hers are definitely the ones that keeps me going back to her. Despite being shy, she's very open about herself and is very easy to be with - she never ran out of topics to talk about! This is the one thing that I always wonder about girls - she, she and she also seemed to never run out of topics to talk about whenever we went out together.

It's not just that though. I think another reason why I went all-out with her is the fact that she's not going to be here for long - so the risk is somewhat lesser - if she rejects me, no big deal - she's leaving anyway. If she accepts me.... I guess I never think beyond that since I've never gotten that answer so far :p.

Another reason why I'm so attracted to her is how she seems to reciprocate and made me feel worthy, like what I wrote above. She's also very easy to be with. Sometimes it can feel like a lot of work dating locals - guys are expected to "remember the little things", "plan the date", "can carry out the conversation" (real quotes from girl bios that I mostly swipe left). She definitely didn't make me feel like I need to do any of those.

I'll probably confess my feelings in the few weeks I have left before she has to fly back to the US to continue her studies... Lower risk anyway, right? And regardless of the results, it's been a great experience and may this be a solid step forward in my journey finding the one. This definitely has been one - in understanding myself and what I like better.

All the best in your life's endeavours!