Intense Heart Exercise: Part 2
Oh my goodness... So many things happening in the past few days that my pace of writing cannot catch up with how fast things move the last few days... So anyway just to update you readers (if any), I have reached Beijing in one piece, and I am in good terms with that girl I wrote about in the previous post. So good in fact, it ends up becoming an intense heart exercise to my poor heart who had been void of strong emotions for the past few years.
I had written so many drafts about many things that is happening in the past few weeks, but I am currently juggling between starting on my report (for 2 MC, scholarship provider, etc), getting to know new people (both Singaporeans and Indonesian, and maybe neighbors), settling down in Beijing and the Tsinghua dorm, and settling administrative things... It was crazy. I really don't have much time to just sit in front of my laptop thinking about life like what I used to do back in NUS lol. And then there is this girl from the summer trip.
So after the Summer programme ended, we decided to go to Nanjing first. She is rather weird as in she would not want to touch people's stuff, and to get her stuff touched by other people, AT ALL COST. Initially it frustrates me, because I needed her help with a lot of things that needs her to touch my stuff (since my Chinese is very limited), such as for booking rooms, checking phone balance etc etc, and no matter how I appeal to her to help me, she would not budge. Initially I thought she hates me or something, so much so until she is not willing to help me. There were 2 occasions where I almost lost it due to this weird behaviour of hers, once was when it was raining and she is not willing to share an umbrella with me (okay now that I am writing it and try reading it in 3rd person viewpoint, maybe I overreacted) and second was when I was desperately finding a place to stay in Beijing (it was the night before we left Nanjing for Beijing! This one was totally justified!) On the second one though, I managed to calm myself down. By that time I have gotten into this state of trying to understand her. So instead of imposing her the normal people's behaviour, I just try to avoid asking her for something that results in her needing to touch my stuff or me touching her stuff. And yeah, so even though it took me sometime to get a place in Beijing (it was the morning we were departing for Beijing!), I managed to do it by myself.
Initally I really thought she hates me. When I got the accommodation in Beijing, and it turned out to be the place where she stays also, she gave me hints that she is annoyed by the fact that I am going to stay in the same place with her again. However, despite all that, we managed to get along just fine, going out together everyday and everything. We started to Whatsapp and tease each other a lot at night because we are staying in different rooms (actually we could just meet at the lobby as the place is very small but yeah). Then the day I was to check out from the place and check into my Tsinghua dormitory came. I should be really happy as I am going to be free from this weird girl and all her antiques, (I was!) but deep down I hoped she would want to come with me to Tsinghua. To my surprise, she asked to come with me!
So she came with me and we walked around Tsinghua, exploring the place. She left in the afternoon, and I was relieved and a little "off" at the same time. I was relieved because finally I can have a private time with myself, something I am deprived from for the past few weeks! However, I was so used to her being around me all day long, walking back to the dorm without her feels weird. But anyway other things soon caught up (I met up with some of the Indonesians in Tsinghua and the NUS people who are going to Tsinghua for exchange who reached that night).
At night, we continued to Whatsapp each other. I asked if she has got any plan for the next day. She said no. And I offered her to go to Tsinghua and watch the China's 70th celebration after the Japanese occupation (cum war against fascism), as Tsinghua actually was going to broadcast it in some of its classroom. However, for some reason they don't allow visitors to enter the school compound that day so we ended up taking a stroll around the Tsinghua's borders. We talked about random things, teasing each other and everything.
That was today (or yesterday, as now is 1 am of the next day alr). So earlier last night (or tonight, whatever) we Whatsapp each other again, tease each other and ask for our plan tomorrow. So before we ended our convo, she teased me how I never start on my report because I went shopping with 2 girls (the 2 NUS students who have checked in are both girls). Then I just tease her back, saying don't be jealous. And her reply was rather off (in my opinion, or I am biased already due to my feelings), mentioning how I should invite her for my wedding some day, and how SEP can be the honeymoon trip. Followed by these very word: "Go for it, <my name>".
My heart skipped a beat. What does that suppose to mean? An open invitation to "confess" to her? Am I trying to read between the lines too much? As I was not very sure yet, I just replied with my favourite ambiguous WhatsApp emoji: the smiley with a sweat.
I wish I could talk to someone experienced and who I can trust about this, but I felt that I have disturbed the one person I wanted to talk to now for too many times the last few days, so maybe I should give him some space before I bother him with my antiques again. Hopefully you see this and ask me about it when you have time! Call me!
To the rest of the readers (if any), good luck and all the best in your future endeavours!
I had written so many drafts about many things that is happening in the past few weeks, but I am currently juggling between starting on my report (for 2 MC, scholarship provider, etc), getting to know new people (both Singaporeans and Indonesian, and maybe neighbors), settling down in Beijing and the Tsinghua dorm, and settling administrative things... It was crazy. I really don't have much time to just sit in front of my laptop thinking about life like what I used to do back in NUS lol. And then there is this girl from the summer trip.
So after the Summer programme ended, we decided to go to Nanjing first. She is rather weird as in she would not want to touch people's stuff, and to get her stuff touched by other people, AT ALL COST. Initially it frustrates me, because I needed her help with a lot of things that needs her to touch my stuff (since my Chinese is very limited), such as for booking rooms, checking phone balance etc etc, and no matter how I appeal to her to help me, she would not budge. Initially I thought she hates me or something, so much so until she is not willing to help me. There were 2 occasions where I almost lost it due to this weird behaviour of hers, once was when it was raining and she is not willing to share an umbrella with me (okay now that I am writing it and try reading it in 3rd person viewpoint, maybe I overreacted) and second was when I was desperately finding a place to stay in Beijing (it was the night before we left Nanjing for Beijing! This one was totally justified!) On the second one though, I managed to calm myself down. By that time I have gotten into this state of trying to understand her. So instead of imposing her the normal people's behaviour, I just try to avoid asking her for something that results in her needing to touch my stuff or me touching her stuff. And yeah, so even though it took me sometime to get a place in Beijing (it was the morning we were departing for Beijing!), I managed to do it by myself.
Initally I really thought she hates me. When I got the accommodation in Beijing, and it turned out to be the place where she stays also, she gave me hints that she is annoyed by the fact that I am going to stay in the same place with her again. However, despite all that, we managed to get along just fine, going out together everyday and everything. We started to Whatsapp and tease each other a lot at night because we are staying in different rooms (actually we could just meet at the lobby as the place is very small but yeah). Then the day I was to check out from the place and check into my Tsinghua dormitory came. I should be really happy as I am going to be free from this weird girl and all her antiques, (I was!) but deep down I hoped she would want to come with me to Tsinghua. To my surprise, she asked to come with me!
So she came with me and we walked around Tsinghua, exploring the place. She left in the afternoon, and I was relieved and a little "off" at the same time. I was relieved because finally I can have a private time with myself, something I am deprived from for the past few weeks! However, I was so used to her being around me all day long, walking back to the dorm without her feels weird. But anyway other things soon caught up (I met up with some of the Indonesians in Tsinghua and the NUS people who are going to Tsinghua for exchange who reached that night).
At night, we continued to Whatsapp each other. I asked if she has got any plan for the next day. She said no. And I offered her to go to Tsinghua and watch the China's 70th celebration after the Japanese occupation (cum war against fascism), as Tsinghua actually was going to broadcast it in some of its classroom. However, for some reason they don't allow visitors to enter the school compound that day so we ended up taking a stroll around the Tsinghua's borders. We talked about random things, teasing each other and everything.
That was today (or yesterday, as now is 1 am of the next day alr). So earlier last night (or tonight, whatever) we Whatsapp each other again, tease each other and ask for our plan tomorrow. So before we ended our convo, she teased me how I never start on my report because I went shopping with 2 girls (the 2 NUS students who have checked in are both girls). Then I just tease her back, saying don't be jealous. And her reply was rather off (in my opinion, or I am biased already due to my feelings), mentioning how I should invite her for my wedding some day, and how SEP can be the honeymoon trip. Followed by these very word: "Go for it, <my name>".
My heart skipped a beat. What does that suppose to mean? An open invitation to "confess" to her? Am I trying to read between the lines too much? As I was not very sure yet, I just replied with my favourite ambiguous WhatsApp emoji: the smiley with a sweat.
I wish I could talk to someone experienced and who I can trust about this, but I felt that I have disturbed the one person I wanted to talk to now for too many times the last few days, so maybe I should give him some space before I bother him with my antiques again. Hopefully you see this and ask me about it when you have time! Call me!
To the rest of the readers (if any), good luck and all the best in your future endeavours!
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